Tuesday, August 17, 2010

The Art of the Redirect

EM and I have discussed at length the difficulty of the transition years after college. People talk a lot about adjusting post-high school, but let me tell you - that was cake. Delicious cake. With really good frosting. Mmm...

What was I talking about? Oh yeah. Life after college. The real world. My circumstances are quite a bit farther from what I had hoped they would be when I was an all-promises-ahead! senior. I have, however, come up with an excellent system that I am going to share with you all: answering questions that I don't want to answer with answers that I don't mind giving. Here are some examples:

Annoying Questioner: "Oh hey, TAB, how's the love life?"
Me: "Actually, my favorite food is lasagna."

Annoying Questioner: "So, you're blogging? Are you doing any *real* writing?"
Me: "It's funny you should ask! I *have* been to Seattle!"

Annoying Questioner: "Weren't you going to work in magazines or something?"
Me: "Well, it's only supposed to be 88 today, but it feels much warmer."

Annoying Questioner: "What happened to that guy you were dating?"
Me: "Thanks! I got this shirt at H&M. They have great deals."

Annoying Questioner: "Good to see you! Have you put on some weight since college?"
Me: "It's a lot of fun, I actually have a membership to a shooting range called Iron Sights. My father always told me that knowing how to handle a gun was an important life skill."

There. Now you all can be prepared for every kind of conversation that any dbag can throw at you.

3 comments:

  1. Haha - awesome. I just found your blog from 20SB and had to comment. I'm a failed writer, lived in L.A. for a short time after college, and can probably relate. I look forward to reading more from you :)

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  2. i, too, prefer to answer the question i heard rather than what was asked.

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  3. Thanks, AB, in advance, and without permission - I may have to steal some of these (especially the gun one).
    Look forward to hearing more of your L.A. exploits.

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