Me (in a discussion about the 'Black and Bleu Burger' at Henry's Hat): I could write poetry about how much I love this burger.
Billie: I'm excited to try it!
Me: Like, if I had to choose between making out with a gorgeous man and eating this burger, I would have a really hard time deciding.
Billie: Dang.
Me: I know. I mean, if the burger came with a Guinness, obviously I would have to choose the burger.
Billie: That should be on the menu as part of the description.
Me: Unless the gorgeous man was offering me a Guinness, then I'd have to go with the makeout. But, that's not really fair because that's using Guinness to sway my opinion, and I love Guinness more than a lot of things on this earth. Okay, so if the guy was maybe talking to me about horror movies or comic books and was holding a Guinness and then was all, "Let's make out!", he'd win over the burger/Guinness combination.
Bille: Hahaha, is the Guinness necessary to wash down the burger?
Me: Noooo, on its own, the burger is definitely enough. Conversely, if there was a hot guy holding this burger and offering me a makeout sesh and then on the other hand there was a pint of Guinness, I'd probably pick the burger/cute boy combo and then after the makeout I'd be all, "Hey do you wanna go get a Guinness now?" and then I would have outwitted myself and won.
Billie: I'm excited to try it!
Me: Like, if I had to choose between making out with a gorgeous man and eating this burger, I would have a really hard time deciding.
Billie: Dang.
Me: I know. I mean, if the burger came with a Guinness, obviously I would have to choose the burger.
Billie: That should be on the menu as part of the description.
Me: Unless the gorgeous man was offering me a Guinness, then I'd have to go with the makeout. But, that's not really fair because that's using Guinness to sway my opinion, and I love Guinness more than a lot of things on this earth. Okay, so if the guy was maybe talking to me about horror movies or comic books and was holding a Guinness and then was all, "Let's make out!", he'd win over the burger/Guinness combination.
Bille: Hahaha, is the Guinness necessary to wash down the burger?
Me: Noooo, on its own, the burger is definitely enough. Conversely, if there was a hot guy holding this burger and offering me a makeout sesh and then on the other hand there was a pint of Guinness, I'd probably pick the burger/cute boy combo and then after the makeout I'd be all, "Hey do you wanna go get a Guinness now?" and then I would have outwitted myself and won.
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So let me see if I understand...in a perfect world, a hot guy would be holding the burger and the guinness and offering a make-out session. At your convenience. That seems doable.
ReplyDeleteYou would think, Chicken. You would think.
ReplyDelete